Vohaul - VSB Voice Scripts

Description: Roger's old arch-nemesis, reborn as a robot. He lives for two things: galaxy-wide domination, and revenge against Roger.
Unfortunately, the less-than-stellar body of this incarnation of Vohaul has ensured that he has - literally and figuratively speaking - more than a few screws loose.
In the "Paragon" ending, he turns into a good guy, though.

Dialog: dVohThrone

Roger: Why couldn't you just leave us alone?

Roger: I mean, seriously - you could've blown up the galaxy with us in it long before we even knew you were still alive.

Roger: And yet, you drag us all the way here.

[VOH1] Vohaul: Weren't you paying attention at the hologram room? This is part of my REVENGE.

Beatrice: What's all this hologram talk I'm hearing about?

[VOH2] Vohaul: You mean he hasn't even told you?

[VOH3] Vohaul: Oh, this will be interesting.

Beatrice: What is he talking about, Roger?

Roger: Oh, yeah... see, down on the surface, I thought I'd already caught Vohaul, but the whole thing was just a hologram and then the apes threw me in jail.

Beatrice: And that was it?

Roger: Uh... pretty much, yeah.

[VOH4] Vohaul: You're leaving out the bit where you had to choose between rescuing Beatrice or the Furkunz.

Roger: Ah, yes! See, I really thought outside the box on that one and attacked Vohaul instead!

Beatrice: You mean you had a chance to save one of us and picked the only option that doomed us all?

Roger: Well... I... uh...

Beatrice: I'm really disappointed in you, Roger Wilco.

Roger: Okay, okay! But still, why not just kill us with the rest of the galaxy?

[VOH6] Vohaul: What part of 'REVENGE' do you not understand?

[VOH7] Vohaul: The hologram was just the first step in an elaborate series of increasingly diabolical punishments.

[VOH8] Vohaul: It took me two years to plan this whole thing out and get everything prepared!

[VOH9] Vohaul: And then you had to ruin it all by breaking out of jail and confronting me here.

[VOH10] Vohaul: So now I have no choice but to kill you in self-defense.

Roger: What's with this 'Moon bomb'?

[VOH11] Vohaul: Perhaps my most brilliant scheme ever concocted.

[VOH12] Vohaul: See, once we place the charges on the core, we have our ships tow the moon out into the middle of an unsuspecting galaxy and blow it up!

Roger: And then what?

[VOH13] Vohaul: And then I take over! Vohaul shall reign supreme!

Roger: Take over what?

Roger: But there won't be anything left!

[VOH15] Vohaul: Meh, we'll burn that bridge when we get to it.

Roger: Did you know Never Kenezer was planning to betray you?

Roger: Yeah, he's planning to kill you and use the detonite for his cyber army or something.

[VOH17] Vohaul: Hmm. That's a bit of a game-changer.

[VOH18] Vohaul: Although... deep down I always knew it was only a matter of time.

[VOH19] Vohaul: Guess I'll just have to take care of him after I'm done with you.

Roger: Or we could team up and get rid of him together!

Roger: Chronologically, wasn't your plan a bit flawed?

Roger: Well, you said you were going to kill me and my future wife.

Roger: So... my son wouldn't be in Space Quest 12... and your mind would be beamed into a non-existent body.

Roger: And we wouldn't be here right now.

[VOH22] Vohaul: Impressive, Wilco. But I have thought of that.

[VOH23] Vohaul: Your son would not be there to save you in Space Quest 4 either, and you would be dead by the hands of my Sequel Police.

Roger: But if I never went into the future and found out about Beatrice being my future wife...

Roger: I wouldn't have enrolled in the Academy and met her, and wouldn't be here to have this conversation in the first place.

[VOH25] Vohaul: Wrong again, Wilco. You see, due to the nature of space-time, it should be noted that...

Narrator: One rather lengthy explanation later...

[VOH26] Vohaul: ...and therefore, even if the chicken did die while crossing the road, the egg would have been genetically synthesized with the DNA from the future, thus completing the loop.

Roger: Oh. It all makes perfect sense if you put it that way.

[VOH27] Vohaul: Exactly, so as you can see, I have nothing to worry about.

Roger: I guess you did do something right.

Roger: Hey, how did you get that hologram done so quickly?

Roger: I'd only just met the Furkunz.

[VOH28] Vohaul: Oh, we had a bunch of different scenarios prepared in advance.

[VOH29] Vohaul: I was really hoping you'd run into the gyro pilot and join forces with him instead.

[VOH30] Vohaul: We put a lot of effort into getting the special effects just right for that one, and it was all for nothing.

Dialog: dVohThrone2

Roger: Whoa, hey, who said anything about killing?

Roger: I can just go back to jail and wait for phase two of the revenge.

[VOH53] Vohaul: ...You would do that for me?

Beatrice: No, he wouldn't.

Roger: Apparently not.

Roger: Wait... if you wanted me alive, why were all those apes trying to kill me?

Roger: Yes, they were!

[VOH55] Vohaul: I gave them strict orders to let you walk right into the fortress.

Roger: What? It was a full-blown manhunt out there!

Roger: If I hadn't worn a fake moustache, I'd be dead!

[VOH56] Vohaul: I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree.

104 - Intro - Vohaul Resurrection Lab

Ape Scientist: I suppose that should do it.

General Forksmith: So, is the new body fully functional yet?

Ape Scientist: Functional, yes, but there were many parts in these schematics that were a bit difficult to follow.

Ape Scientist: Fortunately, my team and I were able to compensate for that by taking numerous creative shortcuts.

General Forksmith: So you believe master Vohaul will be pleased?

Ape Scientist: Certainly. Why wouldn't he be? I mean, just look at him!

Ape Scientist: ...and squint a little.

General Forksmith: Ah, excellent!

General Forksmith: Well, what are we waiting for? Let's do this!

Ape Scientist: Master Vohaul, our supreme commander... I shall now give you...

Ape Scientist: ...LIFE!!!

[VOH69] Vohaul: Assuming direct control...

Ape Scientist: A-ha! Success!

General Forksmith: He's back! Big as life and twice as ugly!

[VOH71] Vohaul: Ahh... I see that Plan B has been a success.

[VOH72] Vohaul: I've been waiting for a long time to try out my new robot bo--

[VOH74] Vohaul: IS THIS SOME KIND OF A JOKE??!!

General Forksmith: Is... is there a problem, sir?

[VOH76] Vohaul: I'M A FRICKIN' SCRAP HEAP!

[VOH77] Vohaul: And... IS THAT A HAMSTER??!!

Ape Scientist: Well, uh... we had to make a few adjustments...

[VOH78] Vohaul: YOU BLOODY APE IDIOTS!!!

General Forksmith: ...Master Vohaul?

Ape Scientist: I think he blew a fuse.

General Forksmith: He didn't seem very pleased.

Ape Scientist: Oh, I think he just needs a little time to adjust to his new surroundings.

Ape Scientist: Besides, he was never much of a morning person.

General Forksmith: I see. Well, carry on.

Ape Scientist: Will do.

Narrator: As Vohaul rebuilds the collapsed apeman empire, one obsession remains constantly on the forefront of his mind - revenge on Roger Wilco.

Narrator: Rather than dispatching of his nemesis promptly, he spends the next two years plotting an elaborate scheme of vengeance until one day he decides that he is ready... to strike back.

500 - Fortress - Hologram Room

Narrator: This is it, Roger! After braving the treacherous icy wastelands, infiltrating the simian ranks, and conquering the sewers, you've finally reached the fortress.

Narrator: Before you sits Vohaul on his throne, but off to the sides are the Furkunz and the love of your life in mortal peril. Looks like this is where it's all going to come to an end.

Roger: Beatrice!

Roger: What's going on here?!

Roger: Beatrice!

Roger: Are you okay?

[VOH81] Vohaul: Too bad I can't say the same for you.

Roger: What do you want from us, you crazy ro...

Roger: ...you're a robot now?

[VOH82] Vohaul: Yes! It's all part of the master plan!

Roger: ...you look kinda sloppy.

Roger: Is that a hamster?

[VOH85] Vohaul: You must be wondering what I have brought you here for.

Roger: Brought me? I got here all by myself!

[VOH86] Vohaul: Yes... that's my favorite part of the plan.

Roger: But didn't I kill you twice already?

[VOH88] Vohaul: You should really learn to sit through lengthy countdowns in the future.

[VOH90] Vohaul: Never mind, the important thing is, we are here now, and we shall settle this feud between us once and for all.

Roger: Right. So what does all this have to do with me?

[VOH91] Vohaul: I am close to unleashing upon the universe the most powerful weapon ever made.

[VOH92] Vohaul: My chief scientist Never Kenezer has been overseeing the detonite excavations for quite some time.

Roger: Detonite?

[VOH94] Vohaul: Something we found at the core of Radon's moon.

[VOH95] Vohaul: Turned out to be the most explosive substance in all the known universes.

[VOH96] Vohaul: Which is quite handy as I plan on using it for the construction of...

Roger: Moon bomb?!

[VOH99] Vohaul: Capable of destroying THE ENTIRE GALAXY!!

Roger: Hmm. I guess I'd better stop you then.

[VOH100] Vohaul: Ah, yes. I was just about to get to that part.

[VOH101] Vohaul: See, you could end it all right here like you always do, so I decided to make things a little more difficult.

Roger: Will this explain those death traps I'm seeing here?

[VOH102] Vohaul: To your left are some scoundrels we picked up near the caves.

[VOH103] Vohaul: They trust you, Wilco.

[VOH104] Vohaul: They believe you're their so-called savior.

[VOH105] Vohaul: And to your right is your beloved Beatrice - also in grave danger.

[VOH106] Vohaul: You can only save one.

Roger: Why are you doing this?!

[VOH107] Vohaul: This is my vengeance, Wilco.

[VOH108] Vohaul: This is why I brought you here.

[VOH109] Vohaul: In mere moments you will know the meaning of loss. You will feel my pain!

[VOH110] Vohaul: To save the one you love, or the ones who love you?

[VOH111] Vohaul: We'll see what kind of a hero you are.

[VOH112] Vohaul: Either way, the galaxy is mine!

Roger: Hey! What's going on here?!

Roger: A hologram? What gives?

[VOH115] Vohaul: Did you really believe I'd be actually sitting right behind the fortress door, just waiting for you to show up?

Roger: Where are you, Vohaul? Come out and fight like a man!

Roger: This is supposed to be the endgame here!

[VOH118] Vohaul: The endgame? Certainly not. This is only the beginning.

[VOH119] Vohaul: For now, however, my guards will be escorting you to a holding area while we prepare for the next stage.

Roger: What guards?

Roger: Oh, crap.

Narrator: Meanwhile, on the moon...

Roger: I can't save either one... but I can still stop you!

Roger: This is for me, Beatrice, and all the baby Furkunz!

Roger: What the heck?

Roger: A hologram?!

Roger: Then Beatrice? The Furkunz?

Roger: Sorry, Beatrice. I'll try to hurry and come back.

Roger: Ok, that was quick.

Roger: I'm coming over, honey!

Roger: What's the point of having a hero around if you're gonna rescue yourself?

[VOH124] Vohaul: Roger and the Furkunz sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

Roger: Holograms! Vohaul, you rat!

Roger: What the...?

Roger: I'll save these guys then.

Roger: Holograms?!

[VOH125] Vohaul: Roger picked his girlfriend! Roger picked his girlfriend!

[VOH126] Vohaul: Roger and Beatrice sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

Roger: I choose you, Pikachu!

[VOH127] Vohaul: That's... that's not a choice.

Roger: Ok. Let me try again.

512 - Fortress - Console

[VOH128] Vohaul: Attention! Wilco's ship just popped up on the radar!

[VOH129] Vohaul: Shut down the automatic defenses immediately!

Ted: Alright, you heard the boss - time to shut down them missiles!

Norm: Um... how do I do that?

Comment: The latter half is a SQ5 reference

Ted: Oh, that's easy. You just adjust the monolever 85 degrees to the left and reverse the phase polarity on the interface grid.

Norm: Wait... wasn't that the procedure for making a fat-free latt�?

Ted: Oh yeah. I think you're right.

Norm: ...would you like a cup?

Ted: Hmm... okay!

Norm: What was that?

Ted: I believe that was the missile we were supposed to disable.

622 - Moon - Mines - Drill

General Forksmith: ...and when I woke up, he'd taken my keys and flown off in my ship!

General Forksmith: I had to hitch a ride on the next shuttle!

Never Kenezer: And you were certain this was Wilco?

General Forksmith: It must have been! Right now he's flying around in my ship, probably preparing to wage a one-man siege on our base!

General Forksmith: We need to stop him before that hairless monkey kills us all!

[VOH131] Vohaul: Gentlemen! Wilco is no more!

General Forksmith: Wow, that was quick.

Beatrice: Roger?!

Never Kenezer: Ah, excellent! I take it his death was swift and immediate then?

[VOH132] Vohaul: No! He has been imprisoned!

Never Kenezer: ...in another dimension, right?

[VOH133] Vohaul: No! In a jail cell! Mwahaha!

General Forksmith: Well done, boss! Well done!

Never Kenezer: ...Rrriight.

[VOH134] Vohaul: And how are things going with the detonite drill? Did we reach the moon's core yet? Can we plant the charges?

Never Kenezer: Not yet, my Lord. We hit a bit of a snag when our reactor blew a fuse trying breach the core's mantle.

Never Kenezer: Fortunately, we managed to mine enough detonite from the surface to refine a single detonite crystal.

[VOH135] Vohaul: Watch it with that! You'll blow us all up!

Never Kenezer: Not to fear, Lord Vohaul. Detonite is only dangerous in its raw form.

Never Kenezer: When refined, it functions as a stable source of energy.

Never Kenezer: A single crystal will provide enough power to finish our operation.

Never Kenezer: We'll need to make some modifications to the drill, though.

Never Kenezer: And as short-handed as we are up here, this could take a while.

General Forksmith: Hey, I heard we just captured a bunch of those Furkunz near the boot camp.

General Forksmith: They don't seem too eager to cooperate, though.

Never Kenezer: Hmm, they would make the perfect lab rats for my mind control experiment.

Never Kenezer: Send them up and I'll have them slaving away at the mines in no time.

[VOH137] Vohaul: Now that's more like it!

[VOH138] Vohaul: And then I shall finally have my MOON BOMB!

Never Kenezer: Indeed. Though may I remind you once again that if we were to blackmail the galaxy instead of destroying it--

Never Kenezer: But there will be nothing to gain if we--

[VOH139] Vohaul: MOON BOMB! (Duplicate)

General Forksmith: Yeah, MOON BOMB!

Never Kenezer: *sigh* Yes, my master. You will have your moon bomb.

Never Kenezer: General Forksmith, do not lose your key. We'll each have one so no one can get into this compartment.

General Forksmith: I won't let it out of my sight!

[VOH140] Vohaul: Yes, soon the entire galaxy will be at our mercy! Nothing can stop us now!

Beatrice: All right, I've had enough of this.

Never Kenezer: Gah! Curses! Forksmith! Stop her!

General Forksmith: Heh, heh, heh. Moon bomb.

Never Kenezer: FORKSMITH!

General Forksmith: Oh, right, right.

701 - Moon - Vohaul's Lair

Roger: Um... Hi.

Roger: You're... not surprised to see me?

[VOH142] Vohaul: After the evacuation of the fortress and the little revolution up here?

[VOH143] Vohaul: No, I'm not surprised.

[VOH144] Vohaul: Annoyed, perhaps. But not surprised.

Roger: Wait, you're not another hologram, are you?

[VOH146] Vohaul: But rest assured, I am not unprepared.

[VOH147] Vohaul: This room is wired into my presence. I can destroy you with but a thought.

[VOH148] Vohaul: But I'm not without a shred of integrity.

[VOH149] Vohaul: Go ahead, Wilco. Humor me. Make your move.

Beatrice: Does it usually take this long?

Ape Scientist: Don't know. Never did this before.

Finkle: I think he's waking up!

Beatrice: Roger! You're okay!

Finkle: He made it! The Narrator owes us fifty bucks!

Roger: The Narra - Oh, THERE you are! Thanks for leaving me hanging back there!

Narrator: Hey, buddy! Glad to see you back in one piece! I knew you could do it!

Roger: Hang on - I gotta do something.

[VOH150] Vohaul: Man... I just had the craziest dream.

[VOH151] Vohaul: You were there... and you... weren't there. Neither were you.

[VOH152] Vohaul: But he was definitely there.

Ape Scientist: Tell me, Lord Vohaul, how do you feel?

[VOH153] Vohaul: I feel... a lot better now. Like a whole lot of weight's gone! I feel... I feel great!

Roger: And you don't remember being an evil psychosadistic dictator who cruelly enslaved cute furry animals, tried to blow up the universe with a moon bomb, and spent years of your life trying to plot my demise?

[VOH154] Vohaul: Well, I do now. Thanks a lot.

Beatrice: So you do remember everything?

[VOH155] Vohaul: Pretty much. I'm still a bit miffed about that asteroid deal in Space Quest 2, but...

[VOH156] Vohaul: I guess I kinda started it.

Ape Scientist: Hurray! We have our old Vohaul back!

[VOH157] Vohaul: That you do, and I have a lot to answer for.

[VOH158] Vohaul: I guess all the Furkunz will be after my head now, won't they?

Finkle: You better believe it.

Beatrice: And we can't keep these apes locked up forever. They're gonna want revenge on the Furkunz.

[VOH159] Vohaul: This is all my fault. It's time to make peace between the Furkunz and the Apes.

[VOH160] Vohaul: And I'm gonna do it the only way I know how.

Roger: What are you going to do?

[VOH161] Vohaul: Something I should've done a long time ago...

Narrator: One month later...

Roger: Hasta la vista, Vohaul!

Roger: I'm... shutting you off.

[VOH163] Vohaul: Ha! The joke's on you! I'm not programmed into Never's remote yet.

Roger: Hmm. How do I program you in?

[VOH165] Vohaul: First hold SETUP for three seconds...

Roger: There we go!

Roger: Hey, can I take that hamster?

[VOH173] Vohaul: What are you up to, Wilco?

Roger: Just wanted to see if that hamster was maybe powering you or something.

[VOH174] Vohaul: What? Hah! That's ridiculous!

[VOH175] Vohaul: You're about as dumb as the apemen!

Roger: The apemen who built you?

Roger: It kind of makes sense, doesn't it?

[VOH177] Vohaul: No... NO! This can't-- kh-cahn't...

[VOH178] Vohaul: YOU... BLOODY... AAApee... iiiidddiiiiioooottsshhhh......

Roger: Well, that was easy.

Beatrice: I'm glad it's over. Let's get outta here.

Roger: Wait, someone's coming.

Ape Scientist: Alas, my beautiful creation has met its untimely demise.

Ape Scientist: Only now do I see the folly in resurrecting an evil dictator in the form of a homicidal robot.

Beatrice: Are you the guy responsible for this?

Ape Scientist: I was the one who rebuilt him, yes. But in a way, we were all responsible.

Ape Scientist: Once upon a time, Vohaul was a wonderful leader.

Ape Scientist: He treated his workers well, gave us flexible hours - even got us a good dental plan.

Roger: So what happened?

Ape Scientist: I suppose years of stress eventually caught up to him.

Ape Scientist: Started ranting about universal domination and all. Such a shame.

Ape Scientist: We were hoping that we had brought back our glorious leader, but he was worse off than before.

Roger: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but me and the lady have to fly.

Ape Scientist: If only there was a way to get into his mind and fix everything that troubles him.

Ape Scientist: Of course - there IS a way, but who would be brave enough to embark on such a quest?

Roger: Ques... Beatrice? Let's go.

Beatrice: Wait, Roger. What do you mean there's a way?

Ape Scientist: The monkey mind-meld. It is an ancient technique amongst primates that allows one to safely enter another's mind.

Ape Scientist: Of course, it only works if the two people are close enough, like best friends or... arch-enemies.

Roger: I don't like where this is going.

Beatrice: So you mean, Vohaul could become good again. His reign of terror would be over.

Ape Scientist: That is exactly what I say. But once again, who would do it?

Beatrice: Roger, why don't you do it? He said it was safe.

Roger: I don't know, Beatrice. I mean, he's not hurting anybody like this either.

Ape Scientist: Ah, but surely you cannot leave such a good man to such a dark fate?

Penguin: ...even in a cold place, people can have warm hearts deep inside...

Roger: Crap! Why did that come back to haunt me?

Beatrice: So what'll it be, Roger?

713 - Vohaul's Mind - Inner Sanctum

[VOH237] Vohaul: ...MUUUUUUSSSSSTTTTTT...

[VOH238] Vohaul: ...PAAAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!

Narrator: This must the be the inner sanctum of Vohaul's subconsciousness. As you can see, he seems to be dwelling on only one thing these days.

Roger: Well, I guess it's a good thing to have goals in your life.

Roger: Even if they all involve ending mine.

Narrator: Either way, Vohaul seems to be rather docile at the moment. This is a good chance to snoop around and see what's repressing his memories.

803 - Renegade Outro - Underwater Lab

[VOH239] Vohaul: What happened... where am I? Why am I breathing through my neck?

Sea Monkey: Thata be yoursa new gills! Wesa bring you to our secret lair and make you new again!

Sea Monkey: Yousa be da new friend of da sea monkeys now!

[VOH240] Vohaul: No. I have to get back to the moon. I have to complete my weapon. I have to destroy Wilco! Where's a spaceship?!

Sea Monkey: Oh, we-sa no have spaceships!

[VOH241] Vohaul: Then how do I get out of here?!

Sea Monkey: Yousa can never leave! Yousa stuck here FOREVER!

[VOH242] Vohaul: No. That can't be. That's impossible! I can't stay here! You have to send me back!

Sea Monkey: Wesa go poodoo on da doodoo! Whoop-whoop-whoop-whoop-whoop-whoop!

[VOH243] Vohaul: NOOOOOOOOOOOGgggaggogogbogoogobog!!!!!

804 - Renegade Outro - Underwater City

[VOH244] Vohaul: I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, WILCO!

[VOH245] Vohaul: WHEREVER YOU ARE, I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!!

806 - Paragon Outro - Hilltop

Roger: I can't believe you actually converted half the planet's surface into a giant ski resort.

[VOH246] Vohaul: It was the only way to bring everyone together.

Finkle: And now peace has been restored between the peoples of the planet.

Roger: Yeah, but we're talking about the enslavement of an entire race.

Roger: A month ago, everybody was ready to kill each other! If anything, this is the single most unlikely thing to ever happen!

[VOH247] Vohaul: What can I say? Everyone loves skiing.

Roger: Well, Vohaul, I'm impressed. You really pulled through for everyone.

Roger: But a few things still bother me.

Roger: Like whatever happened to Never Kenezer?

[VOH249] Vohaul: Oh, I put him to work...

Roger: And what about the moon bomb thing?

[VOH250] Vohaul: Converted it to an energy refinery. Now the entire planet's fueled by the moon.

Finkle: Well, I'm gonna leave you guys alone.

Finkle: Vohaul, don't forget that thing we got, right?

Roger: So this is how it ends? To never match wits again with my arch-nemesis?

[VOH252] Vohaul: I wouldn't say that. I mean, I'm only one digital copy of the original Vohaul.

[VOH253] Vohaul: I'm pretty sure there's dozens of other copies scattered all over the galaxy in bootleg software, waiting to be uploaded into a supercomputer somewhere that you can fight.

Roger: Oh, right.

[VOH254] Vohaul: Ehhh, don't worry about it. If another version of me ever tries to give you trouble, you know I got your back.

Roger: I guess underneath all that hardware and scary blue scaley skin, you really are a nice guy after all, Vohaul.

[VOH255] Vohaul: And I have you to thank for that, Wilco.

[VOH256] Vohaul: Any other schmoe would've left me for dead, but of all people, it was the guy who killed me that saved me in the end.

[VOH257] Vohaul: I really owe you a lot, Roger.

Roger: You don't owe me anything. It's all in the line of duty for a day-to-day space hero.

[VOH258] Vohaul: So, how about you and Beatrice? Why haven't you popped the question yet?

Roger: I've been wondering that myself lately.

Roger: I guess I've been so worried about what could go wrong, I forgot about all the things that could go right.

[VOH259] Vohaul: So you're no longer afraid?

Roger: I think saving your life has given me a new perspective on things.

Roger: A month ago, I was this close to leaving you for dead, just because I didn't want to take the risk.

Roger: But at the last moment, something clicked.

Roger: And look at where we are now.

[VOH260] Vohaul: The future holds all kinds of surprises, doesn't it?

Roger: Yeah, and I'd be a real idiot to miss a moment of it.

[VOH261] Vohaul: So I guess you'll start shopping around for a wedding ring soon?

Roger: I suppose...

[VOH262] Vohaul: In that case, here you go.

Roger: Holy cow! Look at the size of that rock!

[VOH263] Vohaul: Pure detonite crystal. Fully refined, but I wouldn't put it near any open flames right away.

Roger: Thanks! Bea's gonna love this!

[VOH264] Vohaul: So what are you waiting for? Go tell that girl what's in your heart!

Roger: Right away? But...

[VOH265] Vohaul: Are you gonna do it, or am I gonna have to strike back?

Roger: Strike back?

[VOH266] Vohaul: Get it? Vohaul STRIKES BACK!

809 - Paragon Outro - Wedding

Roger: What the heck?

Finkle: Right on cue!

[VOH267] Vohaul: Well, well, well - look at that. You could almost swear there was a wedding going on. Of course, who could possibly be getting married?

Beatrice: Roger, shut up and propose.

Finkle: Yeah, seriously. Come on. That whole thing with the skis and ramp wasn't exactly easy to set up.

Roger: Beatrice, I'm sorry I kept holding off on this.

Roger: We had such a good thing going and I was afraid everything was going to change once we were married.

Roger: We'd become different people, and eventually drift apart. Maybe not even love each other anymore.

Beatrice: Roger, you don't have to...

Roger: Let me finish. What I figured out is that people always change, and often, it's for the better.

Roger: So no matter how things change between us in the future, I'll do whatever it takes to fall in love with you all over again.

Roger: Beatrice Creakworm Wankmeister...

Roger: ...will you marry me?

Beatrice: Oh, Roger, yes!

Furkunz Priest: I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss... yeah, whatever.

Global Script

[VOH58] Vohaul: Aaah!!! Highly Reflective Octuple-Thick Pseudo-Morphed Windshield Glass!!!

Roger: Bea, look! I can't believe it's finally working!

Script for Vohaul