Script for Ape Scientist

Description: The ape scientist is the genius behind the Vohaul-robot.
At first proud of his creation, despite its shoddiness, he soon begins to see the error of his ways as the reanimated Vohaul's megalomaniac tendencies take a turn for the worse.
He is inspired by Doctor Übermann from Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis, and may sound like that character.

Dialog: dEndingChoice

Roger: Sorry. Vohaul's had his chance.
Roger: Hey... you're not gonna put another hamster in him if we leave, are you?
[SNTS1] Ape Scientist: Don't worry. We've learned our lesson.
[SNTS2] Ape Scientist: Vohaul is gone for good.
Roger: Allright. Let's go, Beatrice.

104 - Intro - Vohaul Resurrection Lab

[SNTS3] Ape Scientist: I suppose that should do it.
General Forksmith: So, is the new body fully functional yet?
[SNTS4] Ape Scientist: Functional, yes, but there were many parts in these schematics that were a bit difficult to follow.
[SNTS5] Ape Scientist: Fortunately, my team and I were able to compensate for that by taking numerous creative shortcuts.
General Forksmith: So you believe master Vohaul will be pleased?
[SNTS6] Ape Scientist: Certainly. Why wouldn't he be? I mean, just look at him!
[SNTS7] Ape Scientist: ...and squint a little.
General Forksmith: Ah, excellent!
General Forksmith: Well, what are we waiting for? Let's do this!
[SNTS8] Ape Scientist: Master Vohaul, our supreme commander... I shall now give you...
Comment: Frankenstein reference! D'uh!
[SNTS9] Ape Scientist: ...LIFE!!!
Comment: Mass Effect 2 reference
Vohaul: Assuming direct control...
[SNTS10] Ape Scientist: A-ha! Success!
Comment: Quote from "Spy Hard"
General Forksmith: He's back! Big as life and twice as ugly!
Vohaul: Ahh... I see that Plan B has been a success.
Vohaul: I've been waiting for a long time to try out my new robot bo--
Vohaul: What the...?
General Forksmith: Is... is there a problem, sir?
Comment: Bit of a running gag line
Vohaul: And... IS THAT A HAMSTER??!!
[SNTS11] Ape Scientist: Well, uh... we had to make a few adjustments...
General Forksmith: ...Master Vohaul?
[SNTS12] Ape Scientist: I think he blew a fuse.
General Forksmith: He didn't seem very pleased.
[SNTS13] Ape Scientist: Oh, I think he just needs a little time to adjust to his new surroundings.
[SNTS14] Ape Scientist: Besides, he was never much of a morning person.
General Forksmith: I see. Well, carry on.
[SNTS15] Ape Scientist: Will do.
Narrator: As Vohaul rebuilds the collapsed apeman empire, one obsession remains constantly on the forefront of his mind - revenge on Roger Wilco.
Narrator: Rather than dispatching of his nemesis promptly, he spends the next two years plotting an elaborate scheme of vengeance until one day he decides that he is ready... to strike back.

701 - Moon - Vohaul's Lair

[SNTS19] Ape Scientist: Excellent!
Roger: So how do we do this? Do I lay down or something?
[SNTS20] Ape Scientist: Step over here and face Vohaul.
Roger: Okay... now what?
[SNTS21] Ape Scientist: All done!
Beatrice: So... do we just leave him like that?
[SNTS22] Ape Scientist: Yeah. He's okay.

Beatrice: Does it usually take this long?
[SNTS23] Ape Scientist: Don't know. Never did this before.
Finkle: I think he's waking up!
Beatrice: Roger! You're okay!
Finkle: He made it! The Narrator owes us fifty bucks!
Roger: The Narra - Oh, THERE you are! Thanks for leaving me hanging back there!
Narrator: Hey, buddy! Glad to see you back in one piece! I knew you could do it!
Roger: Hang on - I gotta do something.
Vohaul: Man... I just had the craziest dream.
Vohaul: You were there... and you... weren't there. Neither were you.
Vohaul: But he was definitely there.
[SNTS24] Ape Scientist: Tell me, Lord Vohaul, how do you feel?
Vohaul: I feel... a lot better now. Like a whole lot of weight's gone! I feel... I feel great!
Roger: And you don't remember being an evil psychosadistic dictator who cruelly enslaved cute furry animals, tried to blow up the universe with a moon bomb, and spent years of your life trying to plot my demise?
Vohaul: Well, I do now. Thanks a lot.
Beatrice: So you do remember everything?
Vohaul: Pretty much. I'm still a bit miffed about that asteroid deal in Space Quest 2, but...
Vohaul: I guess I kinda started it.
[SNTS25] Ape Scientist: Hurray! We have our old Vohaul back!
Vohaul: That you do, and I have a lot to answer for.
Vohaul: I guess all the Furkunz will be after my head now, won't they?
Finkle: You better believe it.
Beatrice: And we can't keep these apes locked up forever. They're gonna want revenge on the Furkunz.
Vohaul: This is all my fault. It's time to make peace between the Furkunz and the Apes.
Vohaul: And I'm gonna do it the only way I know how.
Roger: What are you going to do?
Vohaul: Something I should've done a long time ago...
Narrator: One month later...

Roger: Hey, can I take that hamster?
Vohaul: ...huh?
Vohaul: What are you up to, Wilco?
Roger: Just wanted to see if that hamster was maybe powering you or something.
Vohaul: What? Hah! That's ridiculous!
Vohaul: You're about as dumb as the apemen!
Roger: The apemen who built you?
Vohaul: Exactly!
Vohaul: Uhh... wait...
Roger: It kind of makes sense, doesn't it?
Vohaul: No... NO! This can't-- kh-cahn't...
Vohaul: YOU... BLOODY... AAApee... iiiidddiiiiioooottsshhhh......
Roger: Well, that was easy.
Beatrice: I'm glad it's over. Let's get outta here.
Roger: Wait, someone's coming.
[SNTS26] Ape Scientist: Alas, my beautiful creation has met its untimely demise.
[SNTS27] Ape Scientist: Only now do I see the folly in resurrecting an evil dictator in the form of a homicidal robot.
Beatrice: Are you the guy responsible for this?
[SNTS28] Ape Scientist: I was the one who rebuilt him, yes. But in a way, we were all responsible.
[SNTS29] Ape Scientist: Once upon a time, Vohaul was a wonderful leader.
[SNTS30] Ape Scientist: He treated his workers well, gave us flexible hours - even got us a good dental plan.
Roger: So what happened?
[SNTS31] Ape Scientist: I suppose years of stress eventually caught up to him.
[SNTS32] Ape Scientist: Started ranting about universal domination and all. Such a shame.
[SNTS33] Ape Scientist: We were hoping that we had brought back our glorious leader, but he was worse off than before.
Roger: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but me and the lady have to fly.
[SNTS34] Ape Scientist: If only there was a way to get into his mind and fix everything that troubles him.
[SNTS35] Ape Scientist: Of course - there IS a way, but who would be brave enough to embark on such a quest?
Roger: Ques... Beatrice? Let's go.
Beatrice: Wait, Roger. What do you mean there's a way?
[SNTS36] Ape Scientist: The monkey mind-meld. It is an ancient technique amongst primates that allows one to safely enter another's mind.
[SNTS37] Ape Scientist: Of course, it only works if the two people are close enough, like best friends or... arch-enemies.
Roger: I don't like where this is going.
Beatrice: So you mean, Vohaul could become good again. His reign of terror would be over.
[SNTS38] Ape Scientist: That is exactly what I say. But once again, who would do it?
Beatrice: Roger, why don't you do it? He said it was safe.
Roger: I don't know, Beatrice. I mean, he's not hurting anybody like this either.
[SNTS39] Ape Scientist: Ah, but surely you cannot leave such a good man to such a dark fate?
Roger: Well...
Penguin: ...even in a cold place, people can have warm hearts deep inside...
Roger: Crap! Why did that come back to haunt me?
Beatrice: So what'll it be, Roger?

702 - Vohaul's Mind - Atrium

Roger: Where the heck am I?
[SNTS40] Ape Scientist: Hello? Hello? Mr. Wilco?
Roger: Monkey guy? Where are you?
[SNTS41] Ape Scientist: I do not know if you can hear me, but if you can, you need to listen carefully.
Roger: Okay...
[SNTS42] Ape Scientist: You should be in Vohaul's memory right now.
[SNTS43] Ape Scientist: If you look around, you should find traumatic events in Vohaul's past.
[SNTS44] Ape Scientist: You will need to correct all of these events accordingly before anything starts to take effect.
Roger: Find memories. Fix memories. Got it.
[SNTS45] Ape Scientist: Do not fear anything you see.
[SNTS46] Ape Scientist: Saying specific keywords may trigger bad memories to take place.
[SNTS47] Ape Scientist: These memories may repeat themselves, but do not worry - nothing can hurt you.
[SNTS48] Ape Scientist: In fact, everything should carry on as if you weren't even there.
Roger: Yeah, I'm kinda used to that.
[SNTS49] Ape Scientist: Oh, if you check your pockets, you should still be carrying everything you remember you had.
Roger: Ah, neat! Metaphysical inventory!
[SNTS50] Ape Scientist: Good luck!
Narrator: Well, Roger, now you find yourself wandering the dark, twisted corridors of Vohaul's psyche. Bet you didn't think you'd be doing this when you were brushing your teeth this morning.
Roger: I should've just proposed.