Script for Prisoner

Description: This huge guy is imprisoned in Vohaul's fortress.
He doesn't mind being trapped in a cell, though. He knows of his immense strength, so he does his best to control his temper.
He gets angry when you joke about his mom, though.
He probably sounds like John Coffey from The Green Mile.

Dialog: dPrisoner

Roger: Hello?
[PRIS1] Prisoner: Greetings, my trapped friend.

Roger: So what are you in for?
[PRIS2] Prisoner: Well, I'm not sure, but I guess I must've done something bad or they wouldn't put me in here, right? I mean, that IS why we have law enforcement.
Roger: You're imprisoned by a group of evil monkeys with no sense of right or wrong, led by an evil megalomaniac bent on destroying the universe.
[PRIS3] Prisoner: Then I... I guess I don't really belong here, do I?
Roger: Probably not.

Roger: How long have you been here?
[PRIS4] Prisoner: About a year or two, ever since they built this fortress.
Roger: Have you ever considered escaping?
[PRIS5] Prisoner: Not really. When you're living on a giant frozen ball of ice, a small cozy bedroom with three squares a day ain't bad.
Roger: Good point.

Roger: We need to get out of here before this place blows!
[PRIS6] Prisoner: Oh, I'm okay. Explosions don't bother me too much.
Roger: Right, well - not everybody in this room is as explosion-proof as you. Think you could give me a hand? Maybe break down a wall or something?
[PRIS7] Prisoner: No. I would have to get mad to do that. I don't like to be mad.
Roger: Why? What happens when you're mad?
[PRIS8] Prisoner: Bad things. Bad things.

Roger: The apes have chained me to my bed!
[PRIS9] Prisoner: Oh, they did that to me too. You got a hacksaw there?
Roger: Yeah.
[PRIS10] Prisoner: Do like I did, cut your leg off.
Roger: Didn't that hurt?
[PRIS11] Prisoner: Why would that hurt?
Roger: ...Never mind.

Roger: I bet I could make you mad...
[PRIS12] Prisoner: I'd rather you didn't.

Roger: Well, uh, I guess I'd better get back to... stuff.
[PRIS13] Prisoner: All right. Talk to you later, buddy.

501 - Fortress - Prison Cell

[PRIS14] Prisoner: Uhhh... what?

[PRIS15] Prisoner: I'd appreciate it if you didn't talk about my mother like that.

[PRIS16] Prisoner: Grrrarrh... oh, sorry. I don't know what's coming over me.

[PRIS16] Prisoner: Grrrarrh... oh, sorry. I don't know what's coming over me. (Duplicate)

Roger: Hey, maybe we can use this to escape?
[PRIS17] Prisoner: Wait a second... is that highly reflective Octuple-Thick Pseudo-Morphed Windshield Glass?
Roger: Why, yes! Yes it is!
[PRIS18] Prisoner: From a Tin Foil Turkey?
Roger: No... from an Aluminum Mallard.
[PRIS19] Prisoner: Oh. Then it's useless.

[PRIS20] Prisoner: No thanks.

Narrator: You reach inside the wall and rip out some wires from the back of the keypad. After a few minutes of trial and error, involving several minor electric shocks, you stumble upon a combination of short circuits that disables the force field.
Roger: I did it! We're free!
[PRIS21] Prisoner: Hey, well done.
Roger: Come on, we've got to hustle!
[PRIS22] Prisoner: No, I'll be fine here. I'm not afraid of a little structural collapse.
Roger: Suit yourself, man. I'm outta here!

Reg: Welcome to your new accomodations, Mr. Wilco.
Jail Guard: Should you have any complaints, please let us know, and we'll be sure to have you shot.
Reg: Heh heh heh.
[PRIS23] Prisoner: Excuse me, when will dinner be ready?
Reg: Quiet, or I'll fill you full of lead!
Jail Guard: Leave him alone, Reg. You know bullets only make him mad.
Narrator: Suddenly, an alarm is sounded from within the fortress and an announcement comes over the intercom.
Comment: Galaxy Quest reference. In the movie, the line was delivered with a monotone voice. Might also do a take with an unusually cheerful tone.
Reg: You know what this means, right?
Jail Guard: Cutting work early?
Reg: Cutting work early!
Narrator: Well, Roger, looks like Lewdy has already started the self-destruct sequence. Better luck next time!
Roger: Wait! This isn't over yet, I might still break out and stop the explosion!
Narrator: Oh, sorry. Go on then.