Script for Harmony

Description: The only female Furkunz in the game, rendered an albino by Never Kenezer's experiments.
Harmony is somewhat foul-mouthed and ill-tempered.
Partially based on Joy from "My Name Is Earl" (played by Jaime Pressly).

Dialog: dHarmony

Roger: Awww... look at the cute little lady furkunz.
[HARM1] Harmony: Awww... look at the oversized moron!
Roger: Hey, I'm here to save you!
[HARM2] Harmony: Oh, so now I need saving, do I? Well, how 'bout I bust on outta here and then bust your lip wide open then, huh? Then who'll need saving?
Roger: Maybe I should just leave you in there until later, lady.
[HARM3] Harmony: The name is Harmony, buster, and don't you forget it.

Roger: How did you get captured?
[HARM4] Harmony: Well, there I was in my cave, minding my own business, when suddenly three armed monkey bozos rush in and get mud all over my new carpeting.
[HARM5] Harmony: They tie me up, shoot me to the moon, stick me with some needles, and then lock me in this cage.
Roger: You sound like you've been through hell.
[HARM6] Harmony: Well, the needle part weren't so bad.

Roger: What is this place?
[HARM7] Harmony: That Hoover Kasnoozer fellow - or whatever his name is - this is his private kitchen for doing all kinds of experiments on animals he finds.
Roger: Why? What's he trying to do?
[HARM8] Harmony: Well, between you and me, I think he has some kind of hair issue. Every morning, he shaves off that moustache of his, but it grows back by noon.
[HARM9] Harmony: If I didn't know any better, I'd say he's trying to find a cure for hair, so he's taking it out on us critters first.
Roger: Is he getting any results?
[HARM10] Harmony: Let me put it this way, numbnuts: I weren't always an albino.

Roger: How does Never work around apes if he hates hair so much?
[HARM11] Harmony: You got me, monkey-boy. The guy's off his rocker. He's bound to hurt somebody one of these days.

Roger: Where are all the other Furkunz?
[HARM12] Harmony: They've been put to work down in the mines. The big guy's got some kind of strange mind control over them.
Roger: Mind control?
[HARM13] Harmony: Yeah, they've got these little headbands that make them do whatever someone wants.
Roger: How do I shut off these headbands?
[HARM14] Harmony: What am I? A freakin' encyclopedia? Hell, you probably know more than I do just walking through that door.

Roger: Any thoughts on how to save the Furkunz?
[HARM15] Harmony: Weren't you listening, crap-for-brains? Shut off them headbands.
[HARM16] Harmony: There's gotta be a remote somewhere. Though, I guess moustache-boy would probably carry it on him or something.

Roger: I'll be back to save you when you're in a better mood.
[HARM17] Harmony: I don't get those pills until Tuesday.

617 - Moon - Never's Lab

[HARM18] Harmony: Hands off, buster! At least have the decency to buy me a drink first!

Roger: Here, take this highly reflective Octuple-Thick Pseudo-Morphed Windshield Glass.
Roger: It's not much, but it might come in handy.
[HARM19] Harmony: Why, it's perfect! This is just the sort of thing I've been looking for!
[HARM20] Harmony: Thank you, Roger. I will keep it close and use it if I must.
Roger: Really?
[HARM21] Harmony: Hell no! I've got five switchblades tucked away on me. I don't need your stupid glass!

Roger: I found Never's keys! Stand back so I can open the door!
[HARM22] Harmony: I don't need yer help! I'll find my own keys and break on outta here!
Roger: Oh... all right. I'll just come back later and see how you're doing.