Script for Computer

Description: Various different computers in the game. Should use a different voice for each.

101 - Intro - SQ12 Xenon - Interior

Roger Jr.: Follow me. There are many things we need to talk about.
Sequel Police #1: Quick! This way!
Comment: Fake line code - this will probably have to be implemented as a sound effect.
[FAKE1] Computer: Format Complete in 1 minute
Sequel Police #1: We have failed. Wilco has initiated the mainframe wipe.
Sequel Police #2: Can you recover any data?
Sequel Police #1: Affirmative. We can back up Vohaul's mind and proceed with emergency plan B.
Sequel Police #2: Plan B? I doubt our predecessors are up to the job.
Sequel Police #1: I understand your concern, but our instructions were clear.
Sequel Police #2: Agreed. We have no alternatives.
Comment: Fake line code - this will probably have to be implemented as a sound effect.
[FAKE2] Computer: Format Complete in 15 seconds
Sequel Police #1: Backup complete. Open the time rip.
Sequel Police #1: Long, may Vohaul rule supreme!
Sequel Police #2: Long, may Vohaul rule supreme!

108 - Intro - Mallard Cockpit

Beatrice: Uh, Roger...
Roger: Yes, dear?
Beatrice: Do you know what that sound means?
Roger: My fat-free latté is ready?
Beatrice: It's a missile lock! Get us out of here!
Roger: Taking evasive maneuvers!
[COMP1] Computer: Critical propulsion failure. Main engines offline.
Roger: Never mind. They got us.
Beatrice: I hope you can land this thing better than you can fly it.
Roger: I still have a few tricks up my sleeve. Hold onto something!

201 - Mallard Interior

[COMP2] Computer: The hatch has been unlocked, Ned.

Roger: Computer, open the door!
Comment: Anchorman reference
[COMP3] Computer: I don't know a Ned!
Narrator: The vocal input has never been very much help, has it, Roger?

202 - Mallard Computer

Roger: Computer, open the door!
[COMP3] Computer: I don't know a Ned! (Duplicate)
Narrator: The vocal input has never been very much help, has it, Roger?

403 - Boot Camp - Forksmith's Ship

Roger: Say, does this thing respond to voice commands too?
Ship Guard: Yeah! Go ahead, give it a shot.
Roger: Okay, umm...
Roger: Fly away, you... ship!
[COMP4] Computer: Initiating take-off sequence...
[COMP5] Computer: Powering up engines...
[COMP6] Computer: Recalculating fuel levels...
Roger: Whoa, it worked!
[COMP7] Computer: No, I was just being sarcastic.
Ship Guard: Heh heh heh... that never gets old.

501 - Fortress - Prison Cell

Reg: Welcome to your new accomodations, Mr. Wilco.
Jail Guard: Should you have any complaints, please let us know, and we'll be sure to have you shot.
Reg: Heh heh heh.
Prisoner: Excuse me, when will dinner be ready?
Reg: Quiet, or I'll fill you full of lead!
Jail Guard: Leave him alone, Reg. You know bullets only make him mad.
Narrator: Suddenly, an alarm is sounded from within the fortress and an announcement comes over the intercom.
Comment: Galaxy Quest reference. In the movie, the line was delivered with a monotone voice. Might also do a take with an unusually cheerful tone.
[BEA123] Computer: CORE OVERLOAD. EMERGENCY SHUTDOWN OVERRIDDEN. CORE EXPLOSION IMMINENT.
[BEA124] Computer: ALL PERSONNEL MUST PROCEED TO THE NEAREST EXITS. EMERGENCY EVACUATION IS IN EFFECT.
Reg: You know what this means, right?
Jail Guard: Cutting work early?
Reg: Cutting work early!
Narrator: Well, Roger, looks like Lewdy has already started the self-destruct sequence. Better luck next time!
Roger: Wait! This isn't over yet, I might still break out and stop the explosion!
Narrator: Oh, sorry. Go on then.